Pre-Wedding Purgatory

1: an intermediate state after engagement but before the wedding; specifically : a place or state of strange waiting period wherein according to Jacqueline doctrine the bride waits toiling about her day to attend to minute wedding details as to become fit for marriage.

2: a place or state of temporary lack of work and lots of napping. And dog walking.

Holding Hands

For some of you, having your spouse right next to you during church is nothing new. You've sat next to each other for years in church. Different churches, even. But maybe every Sunday you go through the same routine, drop off your kids in Sunday school and find your way to the sanctuary and sit in the same spot like you did in many Sunday mornings past.

I've been "single" for about 12 years now. And in all the times when I think about married life --- all of its obvious blessings and benefits--- the one thing I always looked forward to most was knowing I would have someone to sit next to in church. Sure, I've had Lauren, especially in recent years and its been great---worshiping as a "family" just the 2 of us. But in 2 years she's gone.

There is something so uniquely wonderful --- and I mean WONDERFUL --- about sitting next to Danny at church. Knowing that for the rest of our lives, we'll sit next to each other in church. There is something so incredibly sacred and comforting having, finally, my someone who I sit next to in church. I love this so much. Yes, we're a "young" couple and we'll be newlyweds and I hear the grumbles of folks that say, "Oh, just give it time."

How long have you been married? When was the last time you thought about what it feels like to sit in church alone despite hundreds of believers surrounding you? When was the last time you were grateful you had the hand of your spouse you could just reach over and hold or squeeze during prayer?

Married life? Yes, I'm looking forward to the obvious stuff. But my heart is so totally grateful to God for a life-long partner to sit with at church. To worship with. To learn about God with. To hold his hand during church.

The Graciousness of Uncertainty

Danny is reading "My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers. He generally shares it with me daily via email. This entry seems particularly applicable to us as we wait on God to provide Danny with a job in Raleigh.
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“It doth not yet appear what we shall be.” 1 John 3:2

Naturally, we are inclined to be so mathematical and calculating that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing. We imagine that we have to reach some end, but that is not the nature of spiritual life. The nature of spiritual life is that we are certain in our uncertainty, consequently we do not make our nests anywhere. Common sense says—“Well, supposing I were in that condition…” We cannot suppose ourselves in any condition we have never been in.

Certainty is the mark of the common-sense life; gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, we do not know what a day may bring forth. This is generally said with a sigh of sadness; it should be rather an expression of breathless expectation. We are not uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. Immediately we abandon to God, and do the duty that lies nearest, He packs our life with surprises all the time. When we become advocates of a creed, something dies; we do not believe God, we only believe our belief about Him. Jesus said, “Except ye…become as little children.” Spiritual life is the life of a child. We are not uncertain of God, but uncertain of what He is going to do next. If we are only certain in our beliefs, we get dignified and sever and have the ban of finality about our views; but when we are rightly related to God, life is full of spontaneous, joyful uncertainty and expectancy.

“Believe also in Me,” said Jesus, not –“Believe certain things about Me.” Leave the whole thing to Him, it is gloriously uncertain how He will come in, but He will come. Remain loyal to Him.